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Specific Communication Skills

By: James Burgess

There are 7 aspects to finding solutions

Specific skills neccessary for communication: NO is about boundaries and identification.

Exactly what problem are you attempting to address? Usually many of us have a real and important need to become clear about what we are trying to achieve. This concerns everything without exception, from things that are useful to avoiding tricky and unpleasant emotions. The problem seems to be to do with how to reach a clear mind and then to find the solutions to problems. The 7 Words System offers a unpretentious insightful method that allows us to get hold of a greatly improved awareness of what it is that we are looking for. It kicks off with the word No. We need firstly to describe accurately what it is that actually we don't want, what is not useful, before we can know what we do want.

Specific skills neccessary for communication: HELLO is about openness and exchange.

What can you learn from others? The next stage concerns the word Hello. We will certainly need to make ourselves open to new potential if we want to open out our choice of keys to our predicaments and problems. We surely know that? To get something different we will need to enlarge our scope and look where we have not previously looked up until now. New thoughts, new friends, new situations and new things are all facets of giving reflection to something we have not up to that time been subjected to. We will want to switch old for new, that we have something to offer in fair return for what we want to acquire for ourselves.

Specific skills neccessary for communication: THANK YOU is about appreciating and valuing.

What do you most value about the offered options? Among all open options, some are more appealing than others and we give them a higher significance, because we appreciate them more. This is explained by the primary word Thanks. Frequently, we overlook the significance of what we have, then blindly move into thanklessness and are likely to assume what should not be assumed. It's more than just a courtesy to demonstrate our appreciation for things we value; it has a major effect in helping us to realize our objectives . Unconsciously, we are magnetized to what we convey gratefulness for, and yet it's equally valid to say that we are able to attract them to us too. We acquire pull when we say Thanks and therefore, in doing this, we naturally bring things towards us.

Specific skills neccessary for communication: GOODBYE is about realization, decision, completion, and moving on.

Whichever way you go, from now on life has changed and will be forever different. Goodbye is one of the seven primary words and concerns a process that has four phases. They are: realization, decision, completion and moving on. What we are saying goodbye to a possible stage of change, and therefore is distinguished plainly as out-and-out rejection of a viable path of action that we had been progressing towards and in future will not go in for. It is a crossroad point in our pick of would-be futures. Goodbye is different from No in that it suggests that we have had involvement already, which now needs to end contrasted with No's repudiation in the first place. Authentic decisions cut the past away entirely and that incisiveness sets up an opening of a doorway that otherwise does not happen.

Specific skills neccessary for communication: PLEASE is about intention and cooperation.

How do you cooperate to manifest your dreams? The future becomes known according to the routines of what has gone before unless we take control of it and bend it to our wants. This calls for to have a vision of how we want it to be; this vision has to be very clear, precise and positive transformed into intention. They differ don't they - vision and intention? The first is fairly illusory and the second is much more centered and controlled. For a vision to become real there must be help. Nothing can be completed without winning the benefit of others - this takes competence, possibly arguments, even stimulation. It is not always vital to tender something such as money or money's worth.

Specific skills neccessary for communication: SORRY is about responsibility, remorse, repair and release.

Do you need to take responsibility and feel genuine remorse for your part in any conflicts and tensions that exist, which underlie the issue? Sorry, the sixth word, is best seen as repairing harm done whenever we've been thoughtless or oblivious to the needs or wants of someone else. The best idea is to make sure we preclude the need to say it by being thoughtful in advance. Why on earth should we? Well it's because anyone we upset may well act against our better purposes and lessen our probability of accomplishing what we intend, so it is simply more judicious to respect others as well as ourselves. It is all about being responsible, having some feelings towards someone whom we've upset and making compensation when we've gone astray . Only then is it feasible to forestall or repair resentment and let go of the lasting unpleasantness that otherwise would increase and continually irritate.

Specific skills neccessary for communication: YES is about accepting and surrender.

Not every path is workable, that's the whole point of being creative...find a way that works for all concerned. The concluding point of our 7 Words model relates with acceptance; there are circumstances when we simply have to tolerate what we cannot change. The word is Yes. It would be nice wouldn't it if we were able to make the world exactly the way we envision it - but in reality we can't. We always need to suffer what comes, and to take what is not exactly what we asked for.

The paramount knack is to trust that everything in due course turns around to our advantage, that the modifications to our plans are all improvements when understood in the perspective of the longer term. Clearly it's not easy to see it when we are still close and attached to our desires of course not! However hold your fire and you'll see that the unexpected events, the surprises and setbacks are actually the best bits veiled as trouble.

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Free Questionnaires and Mini Courses are available on the 7 Words website (www.7Words.co.uk) where you receive free text about your special interests in 7 Words ( www.7words.co.uk/life-management/communication_skills)



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